Total Drama Dirtbags
by FlashWally22
Summary: This Teletoon and Fresh TV crossover features characters of the TDI series, 6teen and Stoked. Join me, Chris McClain in this thrilling and the newest sickest season of Total Drama yet! Who will be the winner and who will be the loser? What challenges will you the reviewers suggest? Find out here on Total Drama Dirtbags updating every two Saturdays. Right here on FlashWally22!


_**Disclaimer to Fresh TV, the creators of TDI and teletoon in general**_

Chris walks up a paved driveway as he smiles to the camera as he said, "Welcome to the new season of Total Drama where we will be filming everything and anything that happens right here in this four wing mansion. But, the producers and I have rented this new urban environment to host our newest reality show. Total Drama Dirtbags where 24 contestants will spend the next year competing in challenges that will pay homage to some previous challenges from previous seasons. 12 contestants will be familiar to you and 12 will not. First will say hello to the first 12 repeating contestants."

The bus pulled up as people got out as Chris introduced them, "Owen, how was the ride?"

Owen then laughed as he said to him, "Awesome! By the way can we get some more of those little bacon wrapped shrimp from the Chinese buffet that you picked us up at?"

Chris then said to him, "Fraid not bra, but we got a killer dinner of breakfast with unlimited pancakes."

Shouting with his fists pumped into the air Owen said, "Wohowoho! Little fluffy round bits of sunny goodness!"

Owen then walked into the mansion as Chris then said to the next person, "Harold how are you doing?"

Harold then breathed as he said to Chris, "Good, Chris, I increased in my mad skills."

Harold walked inside as Bridgette got out of the car with Geoff's hat and her shirt mis-buttoned, "Hey, Chris, uh so how have you been?"

Chris replied to her, "Uh, with my shirt on that's how I've been."

Geoff got out with his hair a frenzy as Chris then asked Chef who walked up, "Are we sure we want to keep these two on the same team?"

Shaking head Chef then saw the next person get off the bus which was Mike. Chris then said to him, "Welcome back Mike."

Mike nodded as Duncan got off, "Duncan how was the trip?"

Duncan then said to him, "Bite it McClain."

Heather got out as she said to Chris, "Out of the way Chris, I deserve this million because I won World Tour. But, if in order to get this different million, I will eliminate the competition again."

Chris then said to the cameras and Heather, "Absolutely Heather."

Chris then said to the next person getting out, "Cameron! How are you?"

Cameron greeted him saying, "Hello, Chris how are you doing?"

Chris replied giving him the thumbs up, "Good, man."

Chris said to the silent giant that got out of the bus, "B, how are you doing man? Going to talk this season?"

B shrugged his shoulders as he went into the mansion. Chris looked a bit peeved as he said to the cameras, "Why did we invite him again."

Chris said to Dawn who got out, "Dawn, how's your aura today?"

Dawn repliedt o him smiling as she held her pet spaniel, "Very good, by the way I'm sorry to hear that your problem is back."

Chris shocked said to her, "H-how do you know that?"

Dawn then replied to him, "Your aura screams of being impone-"

Chris then pushed her towards the mansion, "Yay, yay not on live television!"

Sighing he then said with a smile again, "Thank goodness for this next guy, MIKE!"

Mike came out with Zoey with his shirt off as Vito then said, "Chri-ss How you doin'? Vito is in the Hoooouse."

Zoey waved her hand at Chris saying, "The doctor said that Mike should let his personalities how every once in a while to help control the malevolent one."

Chris then said with a high five to Mike, "Cool, cool, nice to see you Vito and Zoey. Mansion's that a way."

Chris then said as he saw Lightning walk out, "Liiiightning, how we doing man?"

Lightning then shouted at him as he high fived Chris, "Shawesome!"

The bus pulled away as Chris then said to the cameras, "And joining us this season are five lucky teens from Toronto, Canada."

A bus pulled up as the door opened as Jen got off the bus, "I can't believe I got in on the best tv show ever. I am so going to win this with my smarts and athletic skills."

Chris smiled as he said to her, "Welcome, Jen how was the trip?"

Jen replied to him with a grin, "It was great, Mr. McClain."

Chris then said to her, "Mr. McClain is my father, you can just call me Chris."

Jen then laughed a bit as she then said to him, "Aren't a bit old to be saying that?"

Chris glared as he said to her, "Get into the ^Bleep^ mansion already."

Jen then walked in as she said to him with a bit of a whisper, "Sorry, Chris."

Chris then said to the cameras as Jonesy got off the bus, "Jonesy, how's it going bro?"

Jonesy then said to him as he high fived him, "Total dramatically awesome, so going to win this thing!"

Chris then said to Jonesy, "Nice plug in my man."

Jonesy walked towards the mansion as Caitlin got off the bus. Chris then said to her, "Sup, Caitlin? How are you doing today?"

Caitlin said to him, "I'm doing good Chris."

A skate board came out of the bus as Jude landed with a spin as he said to Chris, "Up Chris?"

Chris said to him with a thumbs up, "Looking good, Jude."

Jude then said to him as he got off and hit the skate board up, "Thanks, dude."

Wyatt walked off with his music on as Chris then said to him, "Wyatt hows the tunes?"

Wyatt took off his head phones as he said to him, "They're good man, thanks for the pad for the year."

The bus began to roll out as Chris then said to the cameras, "And now for our contestants from Surfer Paradise."

A third bus pulled up as the door opened letting off Lo as she smiled at the cameras and Chris. Chris said to Lo with a slight bow, "Ms. Ridge-mount how was the ride?"

Lo said to him with a smile, "Just fine, Chris, so will I be staying here?"

Chris then said to her with a smile, "Sure, all you have to do is sign this last emergency paper work."

Lo then said as she was already signing his paper in his hand to him, "Alright, so long as it isn't that waiver you tried to have me sign earlier."

Chris then said to her as he pulled it back and handed it to an intern, "Is was, now Lo you will not be able to sue me or the TD series for any injuries. ^Laugh^."

Throwing her arms to the side Lo clenched her teeth with a low scream. Chris then greeted the next contestant, "Reef, man saw you at Gromfest, nice surfing. Like the newly grown hair."

Reef shook his head as he thumbs uped Chris, "Thanks man."

Broseph got off the bus as he pulled from his hair a sandwhich and bit into it, "Sup, dude, where are the bettys?"

Chris pointed to the mansion as he said to him, "That way, Broseph man."

Fin got off the bus as Chris fived her and said to her, "Nice to see you Fin, nice job winning the gromfest last year."

Fin then said to him, "Nice to see you to Chris, hope that there is some surfing some time."

Laughing evilly Chris said to her, "Oh, I can garuntee it."

Johnny got off as Chris said to him, "Johnny front desk guy, thanks for the awesome room last summer man."

Johnny fist bumped him as he said to him, "No probs, thanks for inviting me here."

Chris said to him, "No probs man."

Emma got off with a squeal, "I'm finally here! I can't believe it!"

Chris smiled at her as he said to her, "Wouldn't be a show without you, Emma."

Chris said as Emma went inside to the cameras, "Alright and now for our final contestant all the way from Nunavut."

A bus pulled as a pair of feet got off, "Nikki!"

The camera rolled up as it showed Nikki as she said to him, "Listen, if you didn't follow my end of the contract then you will regret it, Chris!"

Nikki was holding Chris by his collar as he said to her, "Chris McClain is a lot of things, but he can be said to never break a contract. I will have you and Jonesy be given a private get together from people. But remember, the end said people not cameras. And in return you will hold up your end of the bargain."

Nikki said to him, "Oh, it will be no problem. I will give you drama, drama that you could not even dream of."

Chris walked into the mansion as he said to the people, "Alright, before we start our first challenge. Please, go to the kitchen with the exception of Jonesy."

Jonesy walked up to Chris as everyone went to the kitchen, "Chris man, what is up?"

Chris then said as he walked off, "Just you wait here."

Jonesy then wrinkled his brows as he said to himself, "That's just great, here I gave up a trip to visit my girlfriend at the command of my parents to just be stood up on national tv."

Nikki's voice said beside him as she has snuck beside him and leaned on a wall like him, "Yeah, total lame parents."

Jonesy said as if she was there all along, "You said it Nikki."

Nikki looked at her watch as she then said with a barely audible whisper, "3...2...1."

Jonesy then screamed, "NIKKI!"

Jonesy and her hugged as they then kissed and macked for a full minute. Jonesy then said to her, "Nikki, babe where did you come from."

Nikki smiled at him as she said dryly, "Nanavut, bone head."

Nikki's eyes nearly went out of her head as she was squeezed into a hug. Nikki then smiled as she then said to him rubbing his back, "I missed this."

In the kitchen Nikki joined Jonesy as her friends said normally, "Nikki, sup?"

Jonesy looked from his girlfriend to his friends and said, "I can't believe this, you guys knew?"

Wyatt then said to him, "Sure did."

Jonesy then said to them, "You guys are dead to me."

Nikki then hit his arm as he rubbed it after an 'ow', "Oh, don't be a drama queen."

Chris said to them, "Oh, yeah don't be a drama queen. Hello, it's called Total Drama people. Geez."

Chris then smiled again as he then said to them, "Alright, now, ya'll. We're going to start this season off with a little introduction of mine. First, the new confessional."

The contestants were taken to a broom closet as he said to them, "This is where the future confessionals will be held. Also, all confessions are in going to be spoken in _Italics_. Understood?"

With a nod he then took them to the front doors as he pulled out a remote, "All and this season we have a new way to boot you out of the house. ^laugh^ Literally."

Pressing the button a pair of ceiling doors moved as a large boot came down. Chris then said to them, "The boot of butt kicked off the show."

Chris then went to the living room with the contestants as he then said pulling out a list, "Alright, now this season we will have four teams that shall go with the directions found on a compass. First we have Jonesy, Reef, Harold, Jude, Lightning and Duncan."

The six gathered as Chris then said to them, "You guys will be the, North Neanderthals."

A few people laughed at the name as a few of the guys looked bummed.

_Duncan says pointing, "If you think this is funny McLame, then you got two knuckles sandwhiches coming for you."_

Chris then said reading the list, "Alright, for the next team. Cameron, Fin, Nikki, Caitlin, B and Bridgette you all we be known as the East Emus."

_Nikki said to the camera, "Emu? Seriously? What does that have to do with the show?"_

_Bridgette shrugged her shoulders as she said, "Not the worst."_

Chris then continued reading, "Alright, next team. Lo, Geoff, Jen, Zoey, Heather and Dawn you will be known as the South Scorpions."

The Geoff fist pumped as he said, "Cool, scorpions."

Reef argued throwing his arms, "No fair, why does he get to be on a team will all the bettys?"

Broseph fist bumped Geoff saying, "Cool, job bro."

Bridgette glared a bit as Geoff picked up on this and said quickly, "Well, well nothing can replace my Bridge. And nothing will distract me from her either."

_Bridgette said to the camera, "If Geoff so much as look at one of those girls without my permission then me and him are over. And then that girl is dead."_

Chris then said to the rest of the teens, "Alright and for our last team. Owen, Emma, Johnny, Mike, Wyatt and Broseph you will be known as the West Whales!"

Chris then said as he threw the paper back, "Alright, now for the rules. Each two weeks there will be a challenge and one team will be eliminate a member of their team. The winning team will get hot tub service, massage, epic breakfast and dinner in bed. And, they will get to have private showers and not communal bathrooms. The second and third place will not suffer, but the losing team will not only loose a member. But, they will have to service the non losing teams by doing all the chores in the mansion."

The teams groaned and cheered as Chris then said to them, "Alright, and for the first challenge we will have an old fashion contest for each team. The dreaded game of rock, paper, scissors to decide who the team captains will be."

Jonesy then said kinda seeing it as not a bad deal, "What's so dreaded about that?"

Chris then laughed as he said to the, "Oh, did I forget to mention if you loose then you will receive the **reward** of having the victory pieces land on you. ^laugh^ For example if you play scissors and someone plays rocks. Then the looser will have rocks hit them from the ceiling. ^Laugh^"

_Heather then said to the camera, "Alright, time to make sure that loser gets voted off first."_

_Nikki says to the camera, "It hasn't even been an hour and Jonesy the idiot of a boyfriend is making himself into a target. Arg!"_

_Fin then said to the camera, "Way to be a cooke Jonesy."_

Chris then said to the North Neanderthals, "You guys are up first. Duncan vs Harold!"

Harold and Duncan met in the middle as they shot out. Chris laughed as he said to Duncan, "Sorry, Duncan paper beats rock."

Duncan then said with a shrug, "How harmful could paper be?"

Laughing Chris pressed a button as a thousand spit wads hit Duncan into a wall.

_Fisting pumping Harold said, "Yes!"_

_Jonesy was laughing, "Hahaha, disgusting!"_

Harold stood with his eyes squinting at Jude's as they then shot. Chris then said to Jude, "Sorry, Jude man Harold is just on fire. Scissors beats paper. Now, sense we can't stab you with scissors the producers have given me an alternative."

Chris pressed a button as a balloon came out with a pair of scissors poking it. A large sound blasted from it at Jude as he flew back.

(You get the idea)

Chris then said to the teams, "Congratulations, for the North Neanderthals your captain is. Lightning! For the East Emus, Caitlin! South Scorpions your captain is Geoff! And finally for the West Whales the captain is Emma!"

The teams cheered as Chris then said to them, "Now, for the final challenge of the night. Your team captains will have a duel of ultimate proportions!"

Suddenly the teams were all gathered in cages except the captains in the basement. Chris then said as he presented the captains with foamed base ball bats, "Time for the gladiator match up! Each captain will fight with their color of bats. Blue for the North Neanderthals, pink for the East Emus, green for the South Scorpions and purple for the West Whales. Now, everytime you hit an opposing captain. That captain's team will be dipped into a vat of Chef's 3 month old jambalaya!"

The various members and contestants barfed as they saw below them the vats. Chris laughed as he said to them with a correction, "Correction, jambalaya and barf. Now, the goal of this is to get a captain to land on their backs and be pinned for three seconds. Alright, start the bash now!"

Caitlin gasped as she ducked from a swing that came at her from Lightning. Geoff took his bat at Lightning's face.

_Shivering Reef said, "This will never come off!"_

Caitlin leaped up and over Emma's swing as she hit the back of Emma's head.

_Wyatt said still shaking jambalaya out of his head phones, "Alright, first lost and Emma is going home! She ruined my head phones! And I got shrimp where shrimp doesn't belong!"_

Lightning landed on his back as he rolled off the ground a second later. He then swung his bat at Caitlin as she hit the ground and was pinned as Geoff was smacked by Emma making him fall on Caitlin. Chris then said throwing his arms up, "And we have a winner!"

Everyone looked as Chris explained, "Since, Geoff pinned Caitlin the South Scorpions win!"

The girls of South Scorpion cheered as Chris then said to the losers, "East Emus, I'll see you tonight in the common area."

The East Emus were sitting in the common area as Chris then said to them, "Alright, those who get the beaver tail stay. The one who doesn't get the boot. And will never return, ever."

Chris then tossed to the people as he called their name, "Nikki, B, Bridgette, Cameron and Fin. Sorry, Caitlin you've been booted out of the mansion."

Caitlin sighed as she got up and walked to the door. She screamed as she was booted out of the house. Chris then said to the cameras, "One out and 23 more to go. Who will stay and who will go. And will your suggestion in the reviews be the next challenge? Find out right here two weeks from now on Total Drama Dirtbags!"


End file.
